Biggie seriously needs a Big Brother of his own. That dude’s got major issues. Sure I was willing to overlook the whole, “This is Big Brother. I am feeling low, cheer me up” shtick from weeks gone by, but his latest stunt takes the cake. Apparently he is on holiday in Zanzibar and he won’t come back until the housemates paint him a card.
Well isn’t that quaint? I mean, we are all sick of the factions and the great divide andLerato, but do you see us packing our bags and going on holiday? No! And don’t think I haven’t considered the idea. The sight and sound of Lerato is enough to send anyone off to la-la land. Speaking of whom…
We know for a fact that Lerato is such a *word removed lest I incur the wrath of the Broadcasting Council*, but we have managed to accommodate her oddities. Then, get this, she wakes up and there is a puddle of wetness on her bed and her clothes which she dismisses as “Sweat” after touching them and smelling her fingers. SWEAT? Come on, someone’s clearly taking the piss (see what I did back there?).
Give me a break, who wakes up and has to smell liquid to confirm that they sweated during the course of the night. Then again maybe it really is sweat, but what does that mean? She clearly sweated lots more on her own than she did when she was with Max in the Penthouse.
There was some activity at the beginning of the week that saw the housemates dipping tampons in glasses with a red liquid…I am not touching this task that clearly has strings attached.
In other news, the housemates were hit hard by the fake evictions, so hard they got deluded. Maureen was shaken to the core, which produced the proclamation, “I think she truly loved me…she would do anything for me” not Mother Theresa, Awful-nekka!
There was no change in the nominees up for eviction, but the “dripping water bottle on legs” that is Lerato turned psychic and confided in Bertha that “I already knew our names will be mentioned.” I honestly can’t figure out how she arrived at that startling conclusion. Seriously, they are “only” outnumbered and lord knows that does not count in the voting process back here in Africa.
The Maude mix (Maureen and Code) continued albeit a notch higher than usual. Code asked himself the questions he figured Mau would ask, “Am I in love with you?” “Do I see us together after this?” “Do I want to make love to you?” and then answered only the last one honestly, “Yes!”. Maureen didn’t see through this and eagerly jumped into sexy Lingerie. Hang on,Lingerie + a Ugandan? YEAH! We are so ready for CHOGM!
And that was before the Penthouse visit…
Speaking of houses pent in nature (Penthouses! Weak attempt at humour, but there’s a pepper that gets by on worse), there was barely any activity in there between Awful-nekka and Kwaku. Yes they discussed the whole rift in the house and who was behind it, but aside from that. NOTHING.
If that section of the show had running commentary I reckon it would run thus, “Offunekka wakes up, she speaks to Kwaku. Kwaku too, speaks to her. They watch the other housemates. They suffer the boredom of thousands across the continent. They eat, they drink. They sleep…”
Jackie Bauer (that’s Bertha to you!) continues with being a magnificent *another word removed* and went straight to the point with Maureen and told her to her face that she doesn’t like her. There were some incidents involving insurbordination wherein the wicked sisters of BBA (Lerato and Bertha) booed Cinderella (ha!) when she suggested they sing a song about people they miss on the outside. Did she mean “Outside Countries”?
Code and Dutty Dreads seem to be missing their women… their REAL women. In REAL life, not in this façade. I suppose Richard’s gotten that way after falling out with the Squirrel of Angolan origin. He even went as far as seeking advice from the sisters of fate (Bertha and Lerato). Code… Well, if I was with Maureen and she’d refused to let me make love to her, I’d miss my REAL woman, even if I had to make one up.Which is not the case with Code. He doesn’t have to make one up. She is as real as only a real woman stuck with a loser like Code can be…
Did I mention how much I adore Maureen? No? Moving on…
I so badly want Lerato to be evicted this time round, but it would be cool to watch the show with Bertha out of the house and Lerato stuck with the Akon wannabe (Kwaku) as her confidant.